Thursday, January 5, 2012

The Cloud

by Drew Martin
Walt Disney was restless in the afterlife. The Cloud was boring, but then it filled with digital information: articles, photos and movies. Walt, the omnivore that he is, devours all of it. One of his favorite things to watch is a performance by Lenka Klodová. In the piece, Lenka gives a survey of art with large, painted cardboard panels and her big, bare breasts. You never actually see Lenka topless because she stands behind the boards. To begin, Lenka holds up a large panel with a painting of Madonna/Virgin Mary and baby Jesus. Then she knocks out the head of the Christ child and substitutes his cherubic face with a round breast. The small crowd in the brick room cheers at the transformation of Christ from mere paper into living flesh. An old man with a scraggly beard raises his hands and shouts..."It's a miracle!" Lenka then holds up a still-life painting of a bowl overflowing with juicy fruits. She tosses aside two, flat apples and replaces them with her own ripe melons. Finally, (Walt's favorite part) Lenka holds up a huge panel with a painted Mickey Mouse, which is almost as tall as she is. Some viewers start singing M-I-C-K-E-Y M-O-U-S-E. Lenka punches out Mickey's eyes from behind and slips both breasts through the cardboard sockets. Walt admits, Mickey never looked so good.